A shout out for Mother's Day

May I just say that I have the best mother in the whole world. I know that everyone says that, but in this case it's true. She's always been there for me and always has time to listen to me when I need someone to talk to. One of the things that I most admire about her is the way she managed to teach me not with lectures and words, but with a quiet example. I can only recall one or two instances where she had to scold me or punish me. She trusted me when I was growing up and in high school, and that made me never want to do anything to lose that trust. Even when she knew some of the stupid things that me and my friends were up to, she allowed me to make my own decisions, trusting that I'd make the right one, and I usually did, just because I always wanted her to be able to believe in me. Somehow, she managed to raise 7 great children, all of whom turned out good, healthy, and faithful. I know we drove her nuts at times, but she loved us unconditionally and taught us to be great. I can only hope to do half as good a job at raising my own kids that she did with us. Love ya Mom.

And I can't forget to give a shout out to all the other mothers in my life, my wonderful sisters and sister-in-law. What marvelous examples they all are of love and diligence in motherhood. They're the greatest examples and friends I have in my life. I hope the girl I someday marry will be as good of a mother as they have been. You guys are the best!

Look for the Gold!

Many years ago, my Dad gave a talk in church, the message of which has stayed with me ever since. The subject of his talk was "Look for the Gold." He gave an analogy of how miners will dig through several tons of dirt just to find some gold. They aren't looking for the dirt, their attention is fixed on that precious metal. He then asked, "when you look at others, are you looking at their dirt, or do you look for the gold?"

Each of us has a lot of mud and dirt, we are all works in progress, but somewhere down there, we also all have some buried gold. Do we look for that gold in others? Do we recognize the treasure in ourselves? Or do we let the dirt that's in the way distract us from digging down to find it?

A lesson I learned as a missionary is that even the most hardened person has good in them, if you're willing to look deep to find it. Remember that we are dual creatures, with a physical body and a spiritual soul. We sometimes let our worldly desires and wants overshadow and mask the spiritual part of us, but no matter how hard we try and pretend that we're alright, that spiritual side is still there and still hungers for fulfillment. I have been privileged to be able to see people find the gold in themselves many times and be able to find happiness and true contentment. I hope that in all our dealings with others, we work to discover that gold that's in each one of us. No matter how down you may feel, remember that deep down, you're a gold mine!

Doubt Your Doubts, Not Your Faith

As a young adult in this internet era, it's become quite common for me to run across articles and posts online where people seem to pin most of society's problems on religion. Indeed, a great deal of those from my generation are turning away from religion and looking almost exclusively to science and reason for a cure to society's ills. They mean well, and they certainly can come up with many examples where terrible things were done in the name of religion, but I believe they're missing something crucial by side-stepping religious beliefs.

In St. John chapter 6, Jesus gives one of his most doctrinally rich sermons, the "Bread of Life" sermon. For us modern Christians, this sermon is full of sacramental and Eucharistic symbolism and teaches us how to become closer to Christ and eventually return to Him and His Father. However, to many of the Jews of the day, it sounded like Christ was promoting cannibalism, telling them to eat his flesh and drink his blood! A large chunk of the crowd left and stopped following Jesus because they couldn't understand what he was saying. Eventually Christ turned to his twelve disciples and asked them, "Will ye go away also?" Now pay special attention to Peter's response, "Lord, to whom shall we go? thou hast the words of eternal life. And we believe and are sure that thou art that Christ, the Son of the living God." Notice how Peter doesn't say, "of course not! We totally understood everything you were saying there about drinking your blood and stuff, it's cool! We'll keep following ya!" No, he didn't understand Jesus' sermon any more than the rest of them. Many of the things Jesus said probably made him feel uncomfortable and maybe even doubt a little, but he didn't let that doubt and lack of understanding rob him of the one thing he did know, that Jesus was the Christ, the Son of God. Knowing that, the other things were of secondary importance.

You see, having doubts and questions is not a bad thing. It's only by seeking out answers to the unknown that we can learn and expand the horizon of our understanding. However, in all our searching, doubts, and questions, let us never lose sight of what we DO know. We will all have moments that will cause us to question our faith, the scriptures we hold sacred, our religion and what we thought we knew about them. We will learn things that trouble us, but is our faith really faith at all if it's based on our idealized, glorified view of things? Or if it's based on some revisionist version of history? No, the Book of Mormon tells us that "faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true" (Alma 32:21). For faith to be real, it has to be based on things as they really are, on truth, even when we don't understand the reason things are the way they are. And even though for now we may not understand all things, we can come to know enough. Just like Peter we can come to know that Jesus is the Christ and that He atoned for our sins. Sometimes we just have to be content with not having all the answers and trust that in some future day, all will be made clear to us. "For now we see through a glass, darkly; bit then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known" (1 Cor. 13:12).

tl;dr
Always be reaching out and finding answers to your questions, don't stop learning. But don't let the things you don't know make you doubt the things you do know.

It's Not About How Hard You Can Hit...

It's been a roller coaster couple of weeks for me. I feel like I've just be hit in the gut over and over with all sorts of disappointments and setbacks. The nature of those setbacks isn't important, what's important is now is how do I respond? No matter how hard we try, we will be faced with disillusionment; I don't feel like I merited these disappointments in any way, but that's outside my control. The only thing within my control at the moment is myself, my temperament, my attitude, the way I confront these issues. I'm reminded of a quote from the movie Rocky Balboa where Rocky is talking to his son and tells him, "The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain't you! You're better than that!" I've always loved that quote. Sometimes life just punches you in the nose, and you gotta keep moving forward. It's sometimes easier to just lie down and feel sorry for yourself, but what does that accomplish? Nothing! Life's too short to nurse hurt feelings, go out and live!

A Matter of Perspective

I was talking with a friend today about something that I happen to have ample experience with, perfectionism. It's something I've struggled with for the longest time. Certainly it's good to strive for excellence and want to be your best self, but to expect perfection from ourselves will only ever result in disappointment. This friend of mine is preparing to serve as a missionary for the Church in the Netherlands, and I was telling her about how when I first left for my own mission to Mexico, I wanted everything to be perfect, I wanted to be 100% obedient and say all the right things and have lots of success and be the best companion and just in short have the perfect mission. But you know what, as long as I kept that mentality, I was so discontent and frustrated all the time, because, guess what, I'm not perfect, and neither are you, and neither is any other person on this planet. We all have our mistakes, and that's O.K.! As long as I still expected everything to be perfect, the smallest little problem could throw off my whole day, and even though things were going reasonably well, I was miserable on the inside. It wasn't until I was able to let go of that need to be perfect and was alright with just striving to be my best self that I was able to enjoy the experiences I was having and embrace both the good and the bad.

One of the things I think that can cause us to hold ourselves up to such an impossibly high standard is trying to compare ourselves with others. This is especially true given that what we see of others are often their best moments, and we too often compare that to our worst moments; no wonder we can sometimes feel so inadequate and inept! Nothing good ever comes by comparing ourselves to others. Ever. It's good to have role models and even heroes who inspire us to be better, but even then we shouldn't compare ourselves to them. It's only in comparing ourselves to who we were yesterday and who we ought to be tomorrow that real progress and happiness is achieved.

This image below is a sketch I made that helped me visualize how we should look up and keep a vertical perspective, reaching to be better, instead of looking sideways at others and simply striving to be better than those around us. Hopefully this can help you make that paradigm shift the same way that it helped me.

Of Things That Matter Most

The young adult years are a very interesting time of life. Those of you who are not so young adults can verify that, I'm sure. More than anything, it's a time of self-identification, a time to decide who you really are and what it is that you'll stand for. After wading through my own pool of self doubt and confusion, I decided to write my own personal mission statement, a set of directives, objectives, and goals that would become the guiding principles in my life. It was a very enlightening experience to write and revise it, trying to decide what I really wanted to do and who I really wanted to be. If you haven't already done this, I would definitely recommend taking a few minutes, days, or weeks of quiet contemplation to decide what matters most in your life and what you want to be remembered for. Below is my personal mission statement.

                I will remember the important things in life, and keep everything in perspective. The most important thing in life is the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I will let this be the center of my life, and trust that all else will fall into its place. If I let it dictate not so much the path I follow, but how I follow the path I choose, I know I will not be led astray.

                Family is the next important thing in life. A successful life is one that is built on the foundations of a happy home. I will never put anything, not business, money, or personal comforts ahead of my family.

                I will never let a day go by without serving someone else. Life is only worth living if it is spent loving and making other people’s lives better. If I seek opportunities to do good, they will present themselves, and when they do, I will make time to go out of my way to lend a hand.

                No material thing can be worth more than my integrity. Having my promises be accepted at face value is worth more than any amount of money. I will be honest in my dealings with others; I won’t attempt to escape assuming responsibility for my actions, as only a coward seeks to blame his misfortunes and errors on others.

                I will never stop learning. Intelligence is one of the only things that will stay with us forever. This world is so full and vast, we should never have an excuse to stop marveling at the wonders of the earth, questioning how it all works, and searching for answers.

                I will make others feel important. I will recognize that they feel just as out of place and inadequate as I do, and they need me. I will be genuinely interested in others, and won’t care for a moment if somebody else will judge or mock me for the way I act. If I’m living right, many will love me, and some will hate me, but I won’t let the adoration or the criticism go to my head. I will follow the course that I set for myself without letting others tell me what I can and can’t do, and by doing so I will be one of the few truly liberated members of the human race.

                I will live every day to the fullest, and recognize that it is a gift from God. I will laugh every day, take time to think and ponder, and let my emotions be moved, whether out of happiness, wonder, or sorrow.

                I will choose to spend my time doing what I love, and I will be passionate about what I do. I will identify what interests me, and will do it with an enthusiasm that the world is a stranger to. Life is too short to be ordinary. I will embrace what sets me apart, and won’t be afraid to be a little crazy, a little foolish, a little kooky.

                Every day, I will seek the guidance of my Heavenly Father, communicate with Him, praise Him, thank Him, and ask Him for help and for opportunities to be an instrument in His hands. I will search the Holy Scriptures for answers daily. I will seek inspiration, both from the scriptures and the inspiring words of great men.

                I will stay hungry, stay lively, stay energetic, and instill in others that hunger, life, and energy.

                The most important person in the world to me is the person I’m with in this moment. The most important time is right now, I will pass this way but once. I will make everyone feel that there is something great, noble, and special inside them.

                It’s ok to feel down at times. The ups and downs of life are what give it flavor and variety. I will embrace my down moments, use them to reflect and ponder deeper things, and remember that “this too shall pass.”

                I will be remembered for at least three things at the end of my life. I will be remembered as a hard worker, I will be remembered for my sense of humor, and I will be remembered as someone who was always true.

                I will strive to always remember that we are all the most important and most interesting people in the world, each with a limitless potential. We are children of God. We are gods in the chrysalis.

Some background...

Now, I don't really mean for this thing to turn into a journal or a life history, but I do think it would be good for you to know a little background about me. My name is Parker Schnepf, I'm a 22 year old college student currently attending BYU. I was born and raised in Mesa, AZ, as the youngest of 7 children. To date, I have 22 nieces and nephews (you should see our family get-togethers, I think the decibel level we reach is higher than that of jet engines). I love life in all its aspects. I love sports, especially basketball; going out front to shoot some hoops has always been one of my biggest stress relievers. I love music, my mother thankfully forced me to learn piano, which I hated for the longest time, until I could actually start playing cool things, at which point I didn't have to be goaded into playing anymore. I also sing, a lot. In fact, if you ever met me you'd probably get sick of how much I sing when I'm just doing trivial chores. I love my family, they are the most important thing in the world to me, I look up to them, and don't know what I'd do or where I'd be without them.

Probably the thing you should really know about me though, since I think most of my blog posts will touch on this, is the role religion plays in my life. I was raised as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, also known as the LDS Church or Mormon Church. I believe in Jesus Christ, that He lives, and that He is our Savior. This belief system has formed how I think about the world around me and has shaped all my interactions with my fellow man. A common criticism of the LDS Church is that its members are simply blind followers who don't think for themselves, but coming from my perspective as someone who was raised in the church, I can tell you that that isn't true, at least in about 99% of the cases. In my case, I really didn't think much about the church growing up. Yes, we went every Sunday and read the Bible and Book of Mormon, which we hold to be a sacred volume of scripture that testifies of Jesus Christ, together as a family. I knew the lessons; to do what Jesus would do and to be kind to my neighbors, but none of it really sunk in until I was in Junior High. Around the time when I was about 13 or 14, I realized that I only really thought about myself as a Mormon on Sundays, and that the others days of the week, I just tried fitting in, tried being a normal kid, and that bugged me. It irked me that my religion was just a coat that I put on to go to church, and took off when I got home. I wasn't a bad kid, but I had no real depth of testimony in Jesus Christ, in the Gospel, the Church, anything. I had just kind of went with it because my parents did, not out of any personal conviction of my own. So I decided that I wanted to know the truth, I wanted to know if the Church was what it claimed to be, the true, restored church of Jesus Christ on the earth today.

The thing about finding out spiritual truth is that even though there's all sorts of evidence for and against such truth, it's inconclusive. We simply don't know enough to be able to scientifically prove or disprove spiritual truths, though many have tried, and people on both sides of the argument have tried twisting facts to make their point. There's comes a time when you have to accept that the only way to definitively know about spiritual things is through spiritual means. Thankfully, the church has a sort of litmus test to know if its story checks out or not. The Church claims to be restored and founded by God through the Prophet Joseph Smith, and as part of that "restoration," the Book of Mormon was given, to back up the Bible's testimony of Jesus Christ and illuminate some of the doctrines that were disagreed upon by the different sects of the day and which were not clearly understood through the Bible alone. Joseph Smith's account states that the Book of Mormon was originally written on metal plates by ancient prophets of God who lived in the Americas upwards of 2000 years ago. The last of these prophets hid the book safely in the ground, where it was found in the 1820's by Joseph Smith, under the direction of God. Joseph Smith was then instructed to translate the ancient text into modern English, which he did under divine guidance. The result is the Book of Mormon, a 500+ page book of scriptural text touching on everything from gospel doctrine, history, war, politics, family issues, and which is highlighted by an account of the resurrected Jesus Christ visiting the people of Ancient America shortly after his crucifixion and resurrection. That's a pretty bold claim Joseph Smith is making, and the neat thing is, it really exposes him, because now there are only two possibilities, either Joseph Smith was telling the truth and he really was called and directed by God, or he's a really, really good liar. There is no halfway point, it's all or nothing, and the Book of Mormon is the key to finding that all out. So I decided to read the Book of Mormon and do something I had never done before, pray about it, and seek that spiritual answer to a spiritual question, "is the Book of Mormon true, and is the church true?" I even stuck a penny in my shoe so that every time I felt it rub against my foot at school I'd remember to pray and ask the question again and just thank God in general. After a long time of this, I wish I could remember just how long, I finally got an answer. It was simple, but it was enough. I was kneeling by my bed praying one afternoon, asking the same question, and I felt the most incredible feeling. It seemed like my lungs wanted to fly right out of my chest, like my soul wanted to fly, and the most amazing peace swept over me, reassuring that it was true, that I hadn't been lied to and that this wasn't a fraud. In that moment, I knew, more surely than if I had it proved to me with cold hard facts. That confirmation to my searching question forever changed me. It changed the way I thought and acted. I wanted to be better, to be more worthy, and to do good. I can definitively state that my religious convictions have made me a better person, and nobody will ever be able to convince me that religion is the root of society's problems, as seems to be the rising trend.

I felt like that bit of background would help you to understand my point of view and perspective as I write about various things. I have nothing but the highest regards and respect for those who believe differently than me, or who choose not to believe at all. I'm not one of those religionists who believe that anyone who doesn't believe as I do will be punished or not be rewarded by God. I recognize that my understanding and knowledge is very limited and don't presume to know more than others. I had the chance to learn about other people's point of view and see the world through their eyes as a missionary of the church living and serving in Mexico for two years. I believe there is good in everyone, and that heaven won't be for just the Mormons, but for every good, truth-loving, and sincere person out there, Jew, Catholic, Protestant, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, Atheist, Agnostic, Sikh, or whatever else. I believe someday we'll all learn better about the true nature of God, our Father, and that we'll all come to a better understanding of what is true.

An Introduction

Hello friends! Welcome to my blog. I feel like I've always been able to express myself better through writing than through spoken words, and so I figured I might as well take a stab at this whole blog business, mostly as a way for me to explain the way I see things and share with you my personal insights and reflections about life, religion, and God. I think for too long perhaps I've been content with keeping to myself and not fully stating my beliefs and points of view, but really, what purpose do I fulfill in society, in the brotherhood of man, if I stay silent and let my voice remain unheard? We all have a song to sing, and it would be a shame if any of us never let our music out for others to hear and be edified from. You don't have to agree with everything I write or with my way of seeing the world, but I hope you can respect it and that together, we can all come to a better understanding of one another. My greatest desire in writing this blog is that perhaps I can touch someone's life for the better, that's it, it's that simple. I hope now that I've expressed my reasons for writing, we can get on with the real fun and that you can enjoy my future posts! Buen provecho!